Parents usually become worried about the personalities of their children. They need them to be self-confident, self-dependent, and know how to deal with their life situations. This requires a special effort from parents to reach their children at this level. In this article, we will give you advice on discovering the personalities of your children to know if they have strong personality or defeatist ones.

Strong personality and defeatist personality, what are my children’s personality styles?

Strong personality is usually identified in children by their desire to control everything in their surrounding. They like to put their rules over everything and have the ability to make their own decisions.

On the other side, the defeatist personality appears as a negative personality child, who does not care about anything and looks disappointed all the time. He usually looks in a bad mood all the time and thinks negatively about what is occurring around him.

How do you know children with strong personalities?

  • Strong personality children have high emotional intelligence and are actually so aware of what is going on around them. Also, they are so sensitive to what happens around them.
  • Have a lot of questions which need to be answered, strong personality children are so curious about everything in their surrounding.
  • They have a vision. Strong personality children like to set their own rules and to follow their own created visions.
  • Impatience is a general personality trait found in children, but you will find it more in children with strong personality.
  • Refusing to comply with the elderly’s orders is a frequently encountered problem in children, but this type of children can have this problem more in addition to their special stubbornness.

Signs of the defeatists personality

  • As we mentioned before, a defeatist child is considered a negative child with negative thinking and a gloomy look to his life.
  • Lack of self-confidence. This may be accompanied by a feeling of inferiority, and this may lead him to act rudely with the other.
  • Complaining too much and feeling ungrateful for everything he gets.
  • Feeling unable to do anything. Children with this personality style usually feel disappointed and unable to do a lot of things.

Causes of appearance of defeatist personality

If you have a child with a defeatist personality, you have to think about the different causes of it. It may be due to family problems like divorce of his parents and domestic violence. Defeatist personality may appear also due to repeated failure in the child’s life, like failure in his school or inability to make friends in his surrounding.

Strong personality, advantages and disadvantages

Children with strong personality have a lot of advantages like:

  • The leadership qualities like team working ability, and cooperation. They are also stubborn and impatient, so they don’t wait a lot to see the results of their work.
  • High enthusiasm is a persistent finding in their personality. This enthusiasm is a double edged weapon which needs a smart interference from their parents to direct it to the right side.
  • Their anger outbursts are so severe. All children suffer from anger outbursts but they are more frequently encountered in strong personality children.
  • Feeling of entitlement, they feel that they have the right to own everything they want.

Children’s personality styles, is it hereditary or acquired?

Children’s personality styles have different factors that affect it, and of course hereditary factors are part of them, but they are mostly acquired by their environment, their parents, and of course how their parents deal with them.

How to improve the skills of your child?

All your children need help, attention, and a lot of hard work with them. You need to follow your children and help them to improve their skills, this is true of all children’s personality styles. We will give you a guide to help your strong personality as well as your defeatist personality child.

First, how to help your strong personality child?

  1. Give him a space to act, this type of child needs a free space to act with it and let him work with his strong passion.
  2. Don’t underestimate his feelings. You may find it unimportant, or you may find it an undeserved reason to be angry, but you have to appreciate his feelings.
  3. Learn how to deal with his anger. Dealing with anger outbursts is a science that needs to be learned well by parents to control the anger of their children.
  4. Answer their questions as much as you can. This child’s personality style needs answers to their questions and needs to be satisfied about what they think.
  5. Listen to them. It is the most important advice that you would ever know. Listening to your child will improve his skills, increase his self-confidence, and give him the feeling of being safe.

Second, how to help your defeatist personality child?

  1. Fix the real cause. Most of the defeatist personality disorders in children are due to family problems, so the first step to do is to solve these problems to help your child to be more psychologically stable.
  2. Teach your child how to love himself and appreciate himself. This begins from you at first you must love him and appreciate him. Talk to him about his importance and how important what he is doing.
  3. Think positively and teach your child to think like that. Tell him that he can fix anything, solve any problem, and everything will be ok. 
  4. Try to fix his self-confidence issues. Tell him that he is good, he is doing well, and you trust in him.
  5. Don’t over-punish him. You should punish him at certain situations but take care not to exceed your limits.
  6. Never underestimate his feelings. As like other children, a defeatist child needs appreciation for his feelings.

The first step in your children’s raising journey is to know them. You have to learn your children’s personality styles so well and learn how to deal with them. This will enable you to raise a psychologically stable child, which can reach success at his academic and social life.

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